Balls

Excerpt from: Etiquette of Good Society, published London, N/D but probably the 1880s or 90s. We are about to finish serializing this work on the Research Library subscription list.

Chapter XIV.

       Winter one would think to be the proper and only season for the enjoyment of the dance. When sharp north-easters blow, and icicles hang pendent from every roof and tree, then is the time for active exercise, by day and night, on the ice-bound lake and in the mazy whirl in the ball-room But young blood always enjoys being in motion; and dancing on the green turf at the close of a summer picnic, after an afternoon's hard work on the lawn-tennis ground, or a carpet waltz begun impromptu on an autumn evening--each and all are acceptable, and enjoyed. . . . At no season is dancing considered unseasonable.

      It is amusing to see in what light the ballroom is viewed by the chaperons and the chaperoned. It has been described by the former as 'a confined place in which poor creatures are condemned by fashion to hard labour;' while to one of the latter, the motion of the dancers appears to be like

 'A fine sweet earthquake gently moved,

By the soft wind of dispersing silks.'

       Then, again, the style of dancing is depreciated by the elderly frequenters, who say there is not such thing as dancing now-a-days, it is only running about the room.

      The list of dances now in fashion is of greater length than it was a year or two ago. At that time the valse, the galop, and the lancers seemed to occupy the programme. These three dances still continue to be favourites, but others have been re-introduced: the polka and the redowna take turns with the valse and galop, and the quadrille occasionally takes the place of that ever-bewildering, never-to-be remembered maze, the lancers. The coquettish cotillion, the friendly country dance, and the merry reel, are frequently danced: of the two latter, the Swedish dance and the Highland schottische are chiefly chosen. Will the stately minuet, the galliards, the bransle and the torreano, danced by courtly knights and dignified dames centuries ago, ever be brought forward again?

      First let us speak of public balls, amongst which are county balls, hunt balls, hospital balls, bachelor's balls, in fact any ball for which tickets have to be bought in order to gain admittance. When a ball of this kind is in prospect, the first thing to do is to form a committee of gentlemen who will take an interest in such a proceeding, and devote their time and energies to carry the plan out effectually. The first proceeding of the committee is to ask ladies of rank and position to become patronesses. When their consent is obtained, the ball should be announced in the newspapers, together with a list of the lady patronesses, and the names and addresses of the stewards. These stewards are appointed to manage the ball itself, and in order to keep the company select, the tickets can be obtained through them and the lady patronesses alone. In the case of a county ball, not only must the names of those wishing to buy tickets be sent in, but if they are strangers they must present an introduction from some one personally known to the stewards or the lady patronesses, as the case may be. A public ball or room is engaged for the occasion, and as a proper decorator is employed, we will not interfere with his ideas . . . .

      At these balls introductions are effected through the stewards, who wear some badge of office in the shape of a rosette or ribbon. If a gentleman asks him to find a partner, he may go to any lady he sees who is not dancing, and say, 'May I introduce you to a partner for this dance?' The steward having performed his part, retires, and the gentleman asks the lady if he may have the pleasure of a dance with her. The steward's post is no sinecure, for his aim should be not only that a ball should go off well . . . but that everybody should enjoy it; so if he sees a lady not dancing much, he should seek out gentlemen whom he can introduce to her as partners. Then the forming of square dances devolves upon him; any alterations in the programme must be communicated through him to the musicians; he must see as well as he can that the chaperons have been taken in to supper; and if the spirit of the entertainment appears to be flagging, put forth all his energies to revive it. Public balls begin about eleven p.m. and end about four a.m.

      Fancy dress balls are not of very frequent occurrence; but when the arrangements are carried out with spirit and ingenuity they present at once a most gay, and imposing spectacle. People who attend them must go dressed in any costume except what they usually wear. Many assume well-known historical characters; others adopt the national costumes of different countries. It is always well to choose a character and style of dress suitable to the character, face, and figure of the wearer; for instance a fair complexioned person should not assume the garb of an Italian or a gipsy, nor a small and insignificant one appear as Henry VIII or Marie Antoinette. The portraits of the old masters afford ample and reliable information as to costume on a wide range for those who take part in these revelries.

      The first thing to be considered before deciding to give a private ball, is whether you have rooms enough, and whether they are fitted for the purpose. In order to have your arrangements complete, six or seven rooms at least should be set apart for this festivity--two cloak-rooms, tea and refreshment room, drawing room for the reception, ball-room, card and supper rooms. Card tables can be placed in the drawing room when a separate room for their use is not available.

      Every giver of a ball looks forward to being repaid for the trouble and anxiety which it necessarily entails by the success of the entertainment. To ensure this there are one or two essential points which must be heeded. Of course, for the dance to be perfect everything ought to be of the best--good room, good floor, good dancers, good music and good supper; but it is impossible to compass the whole of this list in every case; therefore the indispensable must be pointed out. We cannot alter the size and shape of our rooms, but one must be chosen as large as possible, and nearly square if possible, for a long narrow room is fatal to dancing; nor can we lay our floors afresh, but we need not fatigue our guests by obliging them to dance upon carpet. There can be no doubt that a polished floor, such as one meets with on the Continent, is the pleasantest and easiest to dance upon, but if our boards are rough ones, a brown Holland covering stretched tightly over them will be a good substitute for more substantial smoothness, if properly done., and is far preferable to another device which is sometimes most unwisely resorted to, viz. waxing the floor. . . .

       Good dancers too, it is not within the power of any hostess to command. She can only invite people who dance, she cannot ensure their dancing well. She must invite many guests, too, to fill her rooms and those who dance well are few. This accomplishment is acquired to a certain degree by every girl but whether it is that the other sex are constitutionally gauche, or that they have not been vouchsafed the same opportunities, we will not decide, certain it is that 'bad partners' are more frequently complained of by the ladies than by the gentlemen. . . .

      Good music is a sine qua non. If this be not secured--no matter whether the entertainment is called a 'dance' or a 'ball'--it will certainly be a failure. The want of it destroys all chance of enjoyment. It is impossible to dance well to bad music. 'Bad music' means uneven, uncertain playing, and this is sure to be the result when amateurs attempt to play for dancers. . . . If the party is to be a small one, have a proficient man or woman to play the piano; if it be a large one, then one or two instruments as well as the piano are necessary, such as violin, cornet, or harp, varied by the addition of bells and triangles. The place in the room that these musicians should occupy is a difficult matter to decide. They always seem to be in the way. . . . They should be heard but not seen; or at any rate their bodily presence should not be obtrusive. The best plan we have seen is to place a little wooden hut outside the windows of the dancing room , and take out the window frame, at the same time screening it as much as possible with evergreens, ferns, and flowers; but of course this is not always practicable, for several reasons.

 . . . .

       All the rooms in the house should be brilliantly lighted, for light induces gaiety and mirth. . . . The illumination of the ball-room is another difficulty which besets the giver of dances, especially if the house be a country one. Gas makes a room very hot and oppressive, no doubt, but it is the easiest and most effectual mode of lighting a room, if it is available, and good ventilation can do much to remedy the evils it carries with it. Wax candles are objectionable on these occasions, because fanned and irritated by the continual motion of the dancers, they drop their waxy tears on coat and dress. . . . French lamps, placed on brackets at short distances, and high enough to be out of the way, shed the softest and most pleasing light. If the dance is of long duration, the lamps may require to be re-trimmed one by one during the course of the evening, or darkness will perchance descend upon the scene.

      There cannot be too great a display of flowers. The fireplaces should be screened with them or with large ferns, so filled as to resemble a garden bank. The mantelpieces may be covered with small tin trays, containing flowers. Console tables, or any other flat surface may be decorated in like manner, and on the staircase below the banister, flowers are often arranged so as to appear as if growing there. . . .

      A broad piece of carpet should be unrolled from the hall door to the carriage steps; and where the distance between the two is great an awning should be stretched over the passage. As the guests arrive, they are ushered into the cloak rooms. A maid should be at her post in that reserved for ladies to give her aid in straightening dresses, arranging hair, and removing all trace of slight disorder caused by the carriage drive. She should be armed with needle and thread to sew up the inevitable tears and rents which occur during the evening's campaign. It is also well to number hats, shawls, and cloaks, that they may be restored as quickly as possible to their owners on their departures. The lady having put the finishing touches to her hair, and the gentleman to his tie, the two are next conducted to the tea room. Here a table is laid out with tea and coffee, cakes and biscuits, the beverages being dispensed by a servant. After having partaken of a cup of one or other, and received programmes of the dances, the new arrivals emerge from the room and are then shown into the drawing-room, where the lady of the house receives her guests. Dancing should begin directly there are a sufficient number of people present to form a quadrille, which is generally the opening dance. Those couples who are at the top of the room always begin the figure.

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       The tea room can be used as a refreshment room; if possible, it should be on the same floor as the dancing-room. The table should be well supplied with ices and cups of claret, cider, and champagne; lemonade, sherry, coffee, small cakes, biscuits, and wafers. Two or three servants should be in constant attendance.

       When a gentleman asks a lady if he may have the pleasure of a dance with her, if she consents, he then asks her permission to write his name down as her partner for such a one, and after doing so, and returning the card to her with a bow, he writes her name down on his list of engagements. It is considered 'bad manners' if a gentleman fails to come and claim his  partner when the dance is about to commence, or for the lady to break her promise by accepting any other gentleman who may have asked for the pleasure of the same dance in the interim.

      If a lady declines to dance with any one who may request her, but with whom she does not wish to become acquainted, and has no plea of a former engagement to offer for her refusal, the best course to take is, not to dance that particular dance at all, and then any chance of hurting the feelings of the rejected one is avoided.

      The number of times a lady should dance with the same partner, except under special circumstances, should be limited. Never so often as either to attract observation, or to call forth remarks on the subject.

      After a dance the gentleman asks his partner whether she will take any refreshment, and if she replies in the affirmative he escorts her to the room and procures her an ice, offers to hold a cup for her, and then conducts her to her chaperon, when she disengages from his arm, they bow to one another, and he leaves her. It is not customary to promenade much after a dance; ladies are led to their chaperons almost immediately.

      Private balls usually begin at ten p.m. and end about three a.m.; supper at one a.m.

      The gentleman with whom the lady has been last dancing generally takes her into supper, and the lady's latest partner offers to see her to her carriage.

      It is not necessary to bid good-night to your hostess. You go away quietly, and your departure may not be noticed, lest it should tend to break up the party.

      'Cinderella Dances' are of a less elaborate and expensive character. They originated from the desire of young people to meet frequently for the pleasure of dancing. A 'Cinderella Dance' begins at 8 p.m., and ends as the clock strikes the hour of midnight--hence the origin of the title. No supper is provided or expected; refreshments such as coffee, tea, biscuits, and claret only, are set on the tables.